A Tribute to Dad
A while ago I was informed by my HR that the company was going to send another person to NY for internship. I could understand the new guy would have a lot of queries in his mind--after all I had a terrible time feeling lost for my trip--so I offered help by meeting him over lunch and giving him some tips.
He appeared to be streetwise and outgoing so it wasn't much of a surprise that he was an active diver and sailor. I was impressed. We had a hearty chat and expenses were a huge problem to him, it seemed.
"I would suggest you borrow 20k from your dad first. “I wouldn't expect the company to transfer you the money any time soon." I said and added,” At least not until the 2nd month."
"I would probably have to borrow first. My father doesn't have that kind of money to lend me." he replied.
It then dawned on me that not every family has that kind of cash. In a way, I have taken my dad for granted. Considering the ease of which he had lent me the money, it was a remarkable feat taking into account that he was a taxi driver, not some english-educated manager or director. It was upon realising this that I felt the impulse to type this blog entry.
To be honest I used to dislike my dad. He didn't bother to celebrate birthdays, much less know how to communicate with children. Toys were also non-existent. To him, the rules were simply "I provide your rudimentary needs. You study hard. There was no need for anything else". This kind of character was typical of a father from a traditional Chinese educated family. However, there was a day he brought home a toy jackpot. My Brother and I were elated, only to find out that he conveniently brought it back after it was left behind by a customer in his cab. There was only one word to describe him---stingy.
When I grew older I realised there are always two perspectives you can look at things. Stinginess was thriftiness; strict was discipline. It all boils down to how you count your blessings I guess. I had a dad who paid for my education, provided me a comfortable house and I know I don’t have to worry for his finances and I am really appreciative of this fact.
The way history is written has been changed by technology. Where in the past archeologists had to dig for evidence beneath tons of sediments, the rise of internet has made information easily accessible for future generations. In fact, I would like to think that I am leaving behind digital footprints on this blog, and my grandchildren and great grandchildren, if any, can take a peek into what my world was like and how I perceived this. I am treating this blog as a time capsule and I hope it works.
The Last Entry
Even though I still have a few weeks left in NY I feel that this is the right time to end this blog. Therefore this shall be my last entry. I would probably not blog again when I go back to Singapore. I am using “probably” because you can never be certain with things. Nonetheless I would like thank you for reading, and those who have been commenting.
How do I feel right now? Mixed feelings actually. When I first came I mentioned that this is like a fairyland to me because there are so many things that are so different--- the people, the colossal architecture, the culture. 6 months later it still feels like a fairyland. I am certain that when I reach Singapore and lay in my bed for the first time, it would seem as if I have woken up from a dream and that I never truly left. And it would be a good dream. I know that I am going to miss all these guys I have worked with.
To Scott, I have said that I can never imagine you as a teacher. You are so funny when you are angry and you are angry all the time.
To Santiago, I admire you because you are the badboy I have always wanted to be but I know I can never be.
To Ning, someday I am going to come back and beat you in one of the sports. I will wait till you are old. That is evil but it’s the only way I would win you.
To Jeff, you never fail to light up my spirits haha. It’s terrific to have someone who can appreciate soccer as much as me, especially in this country. See you in England for Arsenal Vs Liverpool!
To Brett, why do you hate soccer?
To Joe, all the best for your campaign to trim down. I would swap places with you. Anytime. Sometimes I feel that I am getting so thin I would become smaller and smaller and suddenly disappear from this world.
To Ellen, once again I have to say that you are the probably the grandmother with the most knowledge in IT.
To Govind, how come I don’t see you regularly at the Toastmasters? Hahaha, just kidding.
To Ajay, it’s nice to meet someone who topped the schools in India. You are one of the smartest guys I have met. You would make a good project manager.
To Brian, any moments with you is never boring. You are funny when you are relaxed and you are funny when you are stressed too. You earned my respect because I know you have the toughest job in this department.
To David, I can’t think of having a better manager to start my career with. You are a passionate manager who is articulate, driven and conscientious. Sometimes I think you have Confucian values but it’s probably due to your upbringing than the influence of Yuan. You could have easily said no to having foreign interns because no one would want to manage people who would complain to you about the weather, the food and their landlords. But you didn’t. Thanks for giving Weng Chew and me the chance to work here and I hope you can continue extending that invite to more young Singaporeans.
May all the nice memories, never go fuzzy with this blog.
American English
Here is a lesson or two in American English
1) The "ti" in anti-social, multi-language is commonly pronounced "tie".
2) When someone tells you to "sleep on it", it means give yourself some time to think about the issue.
3) They pretty much use past tense for every sentence. "Do you want to have lunch" becomes "Did you want to have lunch" and that often made me ponder whether I wanted to have lunch before. "Can you do this for me" becomes "Could you do this for me", which isn't exactly wrong because 'could' is used here for politeness.
4) Some people say "take it easy" when bidding farewell. When they say that to you it doesn't mean that they think you have a big problem you can't get around with. "Take it easy" is almost like a "bye bye".
5) "My folks" refers to parents. I will try calling my parents that when I get home.
6) "If I was.." is used instead of "If I were...".
I think I will still stick to British English.
Staying Connected
When Aunt Jenny came here almost 20 years ago it wasn’t easy, for the only source of information she had was the embassy itself. Calls to US were also costly. She somewhat survived through all of that. In comparison technology advancements allowed me to gather information via ways which would have been unthinkable in Aunt Jenny’s days. I booked my flight ticket online, mapped my route from the JFK to the Grand Central and then to my house and workplace through various websites and even had a bird’s eye view of the locations via satellite images. I knew beforehand that the bus would only be one block away, and that there would be eateries and barber around the corner. I could also see the pictures of the house and the room that I would be living in. The bottom-line: there were absolutely no question marks in my passage here. Auto-roaming makes me reachable at all times and I can call my family and friends at anytime and talk to them for as long as I want because VOIP is so inexpensive.
With all these technology in place one would have thought that it would be easy to stay in touch with Singapore. I realized that it is not. First and foremost, when I tried to listen to Mediacorp’s radio channels via the web browser, it detected that I have a foreign IP (for the non-tech pple, an IP is like an address) and it wouldn’t allow me to stream the radio. Disappointed, I registered with Mobtv. I was willing to pay a subscription fee to download the local drama series, yet again it slammed the door on me with a “We are sorry to inform you that we do not provide the service to foreign IP at this point in time. Thank you for your interest.”
I was desperate to get anything on Singapore and I could by reading the news from the web, but The Straits Times required a subscription fee to read the news and their feeds as well. (A news feed is brief textual news which you can subscribe to very much like you do for a magazine). The Straits Times implemented that a few years ago after realizing that people used its online news as a free substitute for the physical paper. I disapprove of such practice because online news should be provided to anyone, even if they are brief ones like feeds. By keeping all its internet news strictly to a subscription based model, The Straits Times is effectively shutting out traffic of netizens, and I have no doubt that this impacts its revenue from online advertisements too. It is, therefore, not surprising that ChannelNewsAsia and Zaobao are able to garner awards for being the websites with the most hits. Perhaps it is time that The Straits Times revises its business model and offers bits and pieces of news for free again. Every newspaper has a social responsibility to keep its citizens well-informed. A subscription fee only serves to divert netizens to other news sites and it doesn’t help that netizens are used to having free things (think Gmail, Blogger, Yahoo Photos, Wikipedia and YouTube). Having said that, poor Singaporeans do not have that many newspapers to turn to (I wouldn’t consider The New Paper to be one).
In April, the Singapore Government is collaborating with NYSA to host a Singapore Day in Bryant Park in NYC. The Singaporeans in New York can catch up with their homeland while enjoying Singapore’s entertainment and food. In order to reach out to everyone here the website awards an air ticket to New York for those who provide contacts of Singaporeans here. I provided my own contact on their website and I wonder whether that makes me eligible for that air ticket? Allow me to daydream a little bit. Anyhow the country recognizes the problem of Singaporeans forgetting their roots after working for a few years abroad and they have also set up a website for overseas Singaporeans. Thumbs up for their efforts but I think more can be done. If you want Singaporeans to desire to come back an annual one day event wouldn’t do. More needs to be done to evoke their feelings and it is easier to do that today with technology. The web portal for Singaporeans is more of a pull strategy so those who bother to browse the website are those who bother to come back so it is, in fact, still not reaching out to the “quitters”. In my opinion these are what OSU can do:
• Obtain the emails of all Singaporeans who would be going away for 6 months or more, this on a voluntarily basis of course.
• Sign them up automatically for newsletters from the respective overseas Singapore Association.
• Email each of them a “Goodie Bag” which contains a free subscription to Mobtv, Straits Times Interactive and a
Singapore Widget sitting pretty on their desktop pushing news and radio content to them.
• Have a web service that streams news in video
• Remove all foreign IP restrictions. Rave up the server bandwidth and make them sign in with their Sing pass if necessary.
It is time to truly stay connected.
(uploaded album "Niagara Falls")
People on the Bus
As time passes by the many faces on the bus becomes increasingly familiar. These people take the same good old 14 as me everyday at 8:37 and there are many interesting characters. There is the Justin Timberlake lookalike who reads everyday. The book he carries look more or less to me every time. Maybe it's part of a long series or maybe he is just reading too slowly. There is a black man who is always dressed in a hood and sits right at the back, gesturing and mouthing the lyrics from the songs of his PSP. He seems to enjoy his music a lot. He might be the next Eminem. Then there is the beautiful Hispanic lady who gets off 2 stops after I board the bus. Whenever she alights every guy would be looking at her butt and I bet she must have felt tremendously uncomfortable with her butt being threatened. Later I found out that she works at the supermarket as a cashier. There is an Indian couple who are always bundled up during the winter and I always wonder why they do not speak to each other during the entire bus trips. Most intriguing is the young lady who is always dressed in a Gothic style and her make up is Gothic as well and if she is going to college in that dressing how do the professors possibly put up with that? Sometimes at the bus stop an old lady called Sue would appear and preach to me about the goodness of Jehovah Witness. She passed me these books and articles which I hardly read but I still placed them on my shelf to show my appreciation for her efforts even though they ultimately ended up in the dustbins. What a waste of trees. I told her that my name is Wayne but somehow she always insisted on calling my Chinese name and I would have liked to tell her that calling my Chinese name doesn't make her any closer to me although she had an impeccable pronunciation. I would also like to tell her about the concept of 彼岸 and 此岸 but I didn't want to risk having an argument about religion.
And then there are the weird people. The grumpy lady who wouldn't let me sit next to her because she feels more comfortable with more space. Oh yeah I feel more comfortable with more space too and who doesn't? Another grumpy lady would shout at anyone who speaks too loudly and she would go in a squeaky voice,"The whole bus doesn't have to hear your conversations." There is a guy who has a long face and he intimidated me the most in the beginning because he was always trying to talk to me. Later I realised he talks to everyone, waves to every passing vehicle and has the intelligence of a 7 year old.
"It is a nice weather today ya? Not so cold." he would say,"I woke up late this morning you know. Brushed my teeth and then I saw the time and I knew I was late!"
I replied, "Oh is it."
"The bus is late today. Always late. You know why? It's the school buses!" he would say.
I replied, "Oh is it."
"Looking at the bus! Haha. Haha. Look at the bus!" he would say.
I replied. "Oh ok."
He might be irritating and restless but at least he doesn't hurt anyone.
Sometimes I would sit next to the intern who is doing his PHD and would be here for only 3 months. He is an extremely thin fellow with a thick facial hair that made him look so much older than he actually is. There was once I saw him run through the woods at an amazing speed and I asked him whether he did that because the cold was too much for him and he was eager to get to shelter. He said, "Well, I see it this way. If I can run from one place to another. Why should I walk?"
A long pause. My mouth wide opened.
I was too dumbfounded to reply to that.
There was another time I asked him about the things he did in the weekends. He said, "Do you know about quantum cryptography? It is cryptography using the quantum phenomena of quantum entanglement to detect eavesdropping." He added ,"That is my interest and I hope to make a breakthrough in this field. I also looking at formulating everyday problems in mathematical formulas because once we can do that, we can input them into the computers and computers would churn out software solutions that are absolutely free of bugs and other human errors."
A long pause. My mouth wide opened again.
He asked,"So what is your hobby?"
I didn't know what to reply. Any hobby would have seemed childish next to quantum cryptography. I said finally,"I read."
In a way I respect these kind of guys. They are not exactly equipped with social skills but they are focused and highly intelligent and they make a difference to this world. I could have been talking to the next Einstein for all I know.
(upload album "Saint Patrick's Parade")
The Banquet part 2
My conversation with XXXX was interrupted by #####. “Hi, I need 2 persons to sit with our consulate and ambassador for Singapore. How would both of you like to do that?” she asked. I would have liked to ask her what difference was between a consulate and an ambassador but decided against it. I didn’t know anyone anyway, so it wasn’t a big deal for a change of tables and we promptly moved to sit with the consulate and his family. The consulate was a bubbly fellow. After our introduction he started recounting the number of cities he had been living in --- Cairo, Brussels, Geneva, Kuala Lumpur to name a few --- and he revealed the MFA relocated them every three years. It certainly sounded like a fantastic job to be in. Which was his favourite? It was Cairo.
XXXXX asked, "So did MFA prepare you before your trip to each country?"
"I was from the older generation you know, so they didn't do anything like that. But I wouldn't be surprised if they do nowadays haha," said the consulate with his infectious laugh.
Yes the younger generation is better off in a way, but I wondered if the consulate knew that it isn't easy to get into MFA nowadays. I heard from HoeHoe that they made him go through all those grammer and writing tests and it felt like being in elementary school all over again.
The ambassador and a manager from SIA joined us. The dinner then started with a lion dance led by an old Chinese master. The lion dance was amateurish, very much like the one I saw in Washington DC. You couldn’t really expect the lion to perform any stunts when there was hardly any space to move around. But I have to give credit to the master who was hitting the drums with so much zest that it livened up the atmosphere. In fact, I thought he was the only one in the troupe to be showing that much enthusiasm. After the dance the ambassador was asked to address the crowd. He said, “This year is the year of the Boar and people born in the year of the boar are supposed to have good luck. Hillary Clinton and our very own Mr Lee Kuan Yew were born in the year of the Boar and before I ‘boar’ you further let us commence the dinner.”
During the dinner we were entertained by a skillful mc who quizzed us on our very own country. If you are reading this maybe you would like to test your knowledge too. I provided the answers at the end of this blog entry.
1) Who is the first Chief Minister?
2) How many Merlions are there in Singapore?
3) What is the name of our tallest building?
4) If I have to go to Sentosa which MRT station would I go to?
5) What is the oldest departmental store in Singapore?
6) Name 3 of our Presidents.
7) Name the first televison drama.
As the night progressed our consulate belted out a song titled “You were always on my mind”. I think he did really well on the song and the whole time he was looking at his wife while he was singing. When the song ended there were screams for an encore from the crowd. Meanwhile I discovered XXXXX was from the same junior college and university as me. We took the same subject combination in junior college too. Even though she was a few batches earlier it helped that we share a common background because that meant we had more things to talk about. The manager’s wife asked if XXXXX was my wife. I would have liked to think that she said that because XXXXX looked young. In any case the manager and his family were invited because he was in charge of the east coast operations and he had sponsored air tickets for a return trip to Singapore for the lucky draw and auction. The market price of the ticket was $1600 USD and the starting bid was $1000. It didn’t seem right to me because $600 was too little ground to play with and when the winner walked off with a bid of $1500 she had only shaved off a pathetic $100 and I didn’t really think it was worth the effort.
I told the manager I had all the good things to say about his company because the 22 hours trip didn’t kill me though it nearly did and when I recently changed the date for my flight the call was smooth and efficient.
“Oh. Thank you. Not all my customers say that.” he said.
“I am sure I am one of the many hahaha.”
SIA has a huge presence here and many of my friends here are well aware of the brand name. I have more than once chanced upon its advertisements in local business magazines. It certainly is doing a good job.
When it was time to go XXXXX offered me a ride to the Grand Central. I was touched because new acquaintances are not usually that nice. So this was how it felt to be helped by a fellow countryman. While I was on the train I realized that even after all that chat, I still didn’t know the difference between a consulate and an ambassador.
Answers to the quiz:
1) David Marshall. He was the architect for our economy wasn’t he?
2) You would have guessed 2 like I did. But there are 5. Where are the rest? I don’t know, but I suspect some rich men might have bought them and put them in their gardens.
3) Republic Plaza. It’s somewhere in the CBD.
4) HarbourFront.
5) Tangs.
6) Well if you don’t know this you are not a Singaporean.
7) The Awakening, aka 雾锁南洋
The Banquet part 1
I got in touch with New York Singapore Association (NYSA) before I came, hoping that by participating in their activities, it would offer a glimpse into the lives of Singaporeans here. I must have got in contact with the inappropriate email though, because it was the President of NYSA herself replying the emails. The first email was for a social gathering at a pub in Manhattan. I looked at the date. It fell on a Thursday. I replied the email, “I am sorry that I cannot make it as I am staying in upstate and I have work commitments.”
A month later, there came another email with an invite for Thanksgiving celebration. Again it fell on a day where it was definitely too much of an inconvenience to go to the city. I had to reject the invitation again with much regrets. By this time I had already dismissed any hopes of joining their activities.
In Feb I got yet another email from the President. This time it was for CNY celebration in March and it was supposed to be the biggest event of the year for NYSA. My God, this President was actually doing her job at the very ground level and she was so persistent with these invitations that it would have been very bad of me to put this off again. Moreover the day was more favourable this time --- it was a Saturday. No harm accepting the invitation, I thought, even though as a non-member it was slightly expensive.
“You can pay us by check,” she wrote back.
Ohh. I had no means to do that. As Brian would have put it, I have no freaking banking services here to give any freaking checks and would you be ok if I pay you in freaking cash on that night?
“Yes that would be fine,” she wrote again.
Nice lady indeed. Thank you.
And so I turned up that night expecting to see an old lady as President with a couple of tables. It certainly wasn’t what I had in mind. I saw at least 20 tables with a stage in the middle very much like what a typical Chinese banquet would be. I was the early bird, so I sat at the seat reserved for me and the first thing that captured my attention was the big LCD televisions. They were showing the recorded tv programme of Mediacorp artistes celebrating the CNY in Singapore. So I saw GuoLiang, Hong HuiFang, Jamie Teo and these many familiar faces of Mediacorp playing games and busking in the atmosphere of Chinatown Singapore. Now before this I didn’t think I was homesick. I didn’t think of home that much to be frank. But that night I found myself glued to the tv, my senses savouring the sights and sounds of the programme. The more I watched the more my misery grew, and suddenly I felt an impulse to just catch the next flight home. So as much as I would like to put on a brave front and say, “I don’t miss Singapore at all. NY is the gateway to freedom and if I have a chance I would stay here forever.” The fact remains that, I miss Singapore. I truly do.
My misery was cut short by a lady. She said, “Hi, I am ####### and I am the President of NYSA. Are you here alone?”
I looked up to see who she was. A young, elegant lady with a huge smile and she was dressed in a beautiful traditional Kebaya.
“Hi, I am Wayne. You are the one in contact with me all this while? Nice to meet you and that’s right I am alone tonight,” I said.
“Could you help us with the packing of the gift bags? It would be great if you can because we are shorthanded here and I would have to prepare my speech if you would excuse me.”
Ok, so an early bird didn’t warrant any early bird awards and early birds had to help with the packing. In any case I didn’t intend to be an early bird because all I wanted to do was to get away from the chill outside. Well, it was great to lend a helping hand even though I wanted to continue watching the tv that made my misery grow and grow. So what do I have to do? Pack the gift bags? Put in a propaganda magnet? 2 mandarin oranges? Nice. 3 golden chocolate ingots? Why 3? Is it not a pair supposed to have better connotations?
As soon as I am done with the packing I went back to my seat. There was this kid that came up to me and introduced himself. We chatted and he rattled on about how pleased he was to be studying here and joining NYSA activities. What am I doing here? I am on training for my company for 6 months. I didn’t want to go into the complications of getting a government sponsorship that allows me to work for others. That didn’t made sense to most people and I didn’t think it would to this kid. “It must be pretty tough for you not to be able to bring your wife and child over,” he said. OK, so I looked old enough to him to have a child. By the way kid, I didn’t understand why as a year one undergraduate you would have to have a namecard. You have a business? Networking is important but I wouldn’t try to come across as unnatural. And why would you want to spend a bomb on your education using your parents’ hard-earned money? Unless of course your dad is like a Rockfeller. I would rather use that to buy a HDB flat you know. Hope you can understand these things when you grow up. I thought. Good luck to you.
Before long another Singaporean lady joined us. She told us she had been here for 4 years and she had a wine shop in Manhattan and was invited because she had sponsored 3 cases of wine. In her 4 years she had been mugged 5 times and she didn't know what was it about her face that made her seem so vulnerable. One mugger even asked for her MacDonald's. I bet she forgot to ask him how he would like an upsize of fries.
Another lady sat down at the table and started reading her magazine. I didn't want to appear unfriendly so I made my introduction. She was called XXXXX and was a banking associate and she asked me whether I was here to study. OK, now I looked young to her...
...to be continued
